tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-52796947903733986112024-02-21T02:14:22.398+13:00The Daily BeigeMan_in_Beigehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09261862108444079448noreply@blogger.comBlogger45125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5279694790373398611.post-35874863409661057142012-12-17T13:41:00.000+13:002012-12-17T13:41:10.188+13:00New Zealand Claim Historic Win; On Verge Of Internal Collapse<div style="width: 600px;">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="color: black;"><i>This article first appeared on <a href="http://www.thealternativecricketalmanack.com/" target="_blank">www.thealternativecricketalmanack.com</a> </i></span></span></span></div>
<div style="width: 600px;">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="color: black;"><i>on the 4th of December, 2012</i><strong> </strong></span></span></span></div>
<div style="width: 600px;">
<br /></div>
<div style="width: 600px;">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="color: black;"><strong>COLOMBO</strong>
– In the wake of their morale-boosting and series-drawing </span></span></span></div>
<div style="width: 600px;">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="color: black;">victory
against Sri Lanka, New Zealand Cricket has taken the only course </span></span></span></div>
<div style="width: 600px;">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="color: black;">available to them and are on the verge of sacking captain Ross Taylor.</span></span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">
</span></span><div style="width: 600px;">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="color: black;"><br />
“It really is quite simple,” said current New Zealand coach Mike Hesson, </span></span></span></div>
<div style="width: 600px;">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="color: black;">“Victories like this just give the New Zealand public hope that we have</span></span></span></div>
<div style="width: 600px;">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="color: black;"> turned a corner and are heading back to the glory day.”*</span></span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">
</span></span><div style="width: 600px;">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="color: black;"><br />
“Ross Taylor, as captain, has to shoulder the majority of the blame
here. </span></span></span></div>
<div style="width: 600px;">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="color: black;">He has improved his batting average since taking the leadership
role and </span></span></span></div>
<div style="width: 600px;">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="color: black;">there’s a real feeling that the young guys around him might
just start to </span></span></span></div>
<div style="width: 600px;">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="color: black;">believe in themselves. We can’t have that,” said Hesson.
“We’ve just been </span></span></span></div>
<div style="width: 600px;">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="color: black;">hurt too many times before.”</span></span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></span><div style="width: 600px;">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="color: black;">
New Zealand Cricket chief executive David White was quick to back up his </span></span></span></div>
<div style="width: 600px;">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="color: black;">coach. “It is very clear that the problem lies with Taylor. I have
absolute </span></span></span></div>
<div style="width: 600px;">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="color: black;">faith in Hesson and his win-loss record as New Zealand coach
speaks for </span></span></span></div>
<div style="width: 600px;">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="color: black;">itself,” he said.<br />
</span></span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">
</span></span><div style="width: 600px;">
<br /></div>
<div style="width: 600px;">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="color: black;">“There
is no-one around who is doing a better job at dampening expectations </span></span></span></div>
<div style="width: 600px;">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="color: black;">in
our cricket side than Mike. I’ll be having a word with him to see if
there </span></span></span></div>
<div style="width: 600px;">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="color: black;">was anything he did inadvertently that contributed to the win in
Colombo, </span></span></span></div>
<div style="width: 600px;">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="color: black;">but I think that is extremely unlikely.”</span></span></span></div>
<div style="width: 600px;">
<br /></div>
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">
</span></span><div style="width: 600px;">
</div>
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="color: black;">Formerly retired Pakistan cricketer and professional nutball Shahid
Afridi has </span></span></span><br />
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="color: black;">been uncharacteristically outspoken on the developments.
“Obviously, I don’t </span></span></span><br />
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="color: black;">like it when any cricketer takes the focus away from
me, but I find it very </span></span></span><br />
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="color: black;">disappointing that New Zealand cricket is
muscling in on Pakistan’s territory. </span></span></span><br />
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="color: black;">We invented the back-room
implosion. This is just kid’s stuff.”</span></span></span>
<br />
<div style="width: 600px;">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="color: black;"><br />
Afridi went one step further, saying: “In fact, I’d be more than happy
to come </span></span></span></div>
<div style="width: 600px;">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="color: black;">out of retirement [again] and captain New Zealand. </span></span></span></div>
<div style="width: 600px;">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="color: black;">Then we’d
really see some serious madness.”</span></span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">
</span></span><div style="width: 600px;">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="color: black;"><br />
Hesson thought such an idea had merit. “That could work
actually. We need a </span></span></span></div>
<div style="width: 600px;">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="color: black;">captain who can play to the situation and do
something stupid every time. He is </span></span></span></div>
<div style="width: 600px;">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="color: black;">probably an even better option than
McCullum in that respect.”</span></span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">
</span></span><div style="width: 600px;">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="color: black;"><br />
However, sources say that all this posturing may be pointless as the
world is due to </span></span></span></div>
<div style="width: 600px;">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="color: black;">end on December 21st. Not because of anything the Mayans
may or may not have<span style="font-size: small;"> </span></span></span></span></div>
<div style="width: 600px;">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="color: black;">said, but because this might be the day that Sachin
Tendulkar announces his retirement.</span></span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: small;">
</span><div style="font-family: Georgia,'Times New Roman',Times,serif; width: 600px;">
<span style="font-size: small;"><em><span style="color: black;"><br />
* March 16, 1982</span></em></span></div>
<div style="background-color: white; border: medium none; color: black; overflow: hidden; text-align: left; text-decoration: none;">
<span style="font-size: small;"><br /><a href="http://www.thealternativecricketalmanack.com/2012/12/new-zealand-ross-taylor-captain-mike-hesson/#ixzz2FGSmDi2r" style="color: #003399;"></a></span></div>
Man_in_Beigehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09261862108444079448noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5279694790373398611.post-49821488990882174852012-08-21T20:08:00.003+12:002012-08-21T20:18:38.409+12:00Kevin Pietersen Threatens to Quit Twitter, ‘May Have Tweeted Last Tweet'<div>
<div style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', Times, serif; font-size: 14px; width: 600px;">
<i><span style="color: black;">This article first appeared on <a href="http://www.thealternativecricketalmanack.com%20/" target="_blank">www.thealternativecricketalmanack.com </a></span></i><br />
<i><span style="color: black;">on the 10th of August 2012. With thanks to <a href="http://twitter.com/pavilionopinion" target="_blank">@pavilionopinion</a>.</span></i></div>
<div style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', Times, serif; font-size: 14px; width: 600px;">
<br /></div>
<div style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', Times, serif; font-size: 14px; width: 600px;">
<span style="color: black;"><b>LONDON -</b> Kevin
Pietersen, the mercurial and talismanic England tweeter, has </span><br />
<span style="color: black;">announced that he may never tweet for his country again. Speaking at a tense press </span><br />
<span style="color: black;">conference held earlier today, Pietersen revealed the “deep, perhaps
irreparable, </span><br />
<span style="color: black;">divisions” between himself and Twitter, hinting that he may
quit the medium entirely to </span><br />
<span style="color: black;">spend more time with his family, or “+1s”
as he called them.</span></div>
<div style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', Times, serif; font-size: 14px; width: 600px;">
<span style="color: black;"><br />
Pietersen’s high-profile Twitter career has had many peaks and troughs
over the years. </span><br />
<span style="color: black;">When he burst onto the international tweeting stage back
in 2004, he was hailed by </span><br />
<span style="color: black;">many as England’s saviour, and heralded as a
social media hero to rival Ricky Ponting, </span><br />
<span style="color: black;">Jacques Kallis or even the
little master himself, Charlie Sheen. </span></div>
<div style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', Times, serif; font-size: 14px; width: 600px;">
<br />
<span style="color: black;">His
success continued to go viral the following year, when he nailed three
tweets of </span><br />
<span style="color: black;">over a hundred characters in quick succession despite being
trolled by large numbers </span><br />
<span style="color: black;">of South African supporters angry at his
defection from Bebo.</span></div>
</div>
<div style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', Times, serif; font-size: 14px; width: 600px;">
<br /></div>
<div style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', Times, serif; font-size: 14px; width: 600px;">
<span style="color: black;">
His rise was so swift that he was named England Twitter Captain in
2008. However,</span><br />
<span style="color: black;"> he suffered from a slump in retweets, and he was axed
after it was publicly announced</span><br />
<span style="color: black;"> he had unfollowed England coach Peter
Moores.</span></div>
<div style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', Times, serif; font-size: 14px; width: 600px;">
<span style="color: black;"><br />
An acrimonious 2008 for KP™ also witnessed one of the most audacious
events in </span><br />
<span style="color: black;">Twitter history. Against a hapless pack of New Zealand
tweeters, Pietersen unleashed</span><br />
<span style="color: black;"> the ‘switch hashtag’ to devastating
effect. Black Caps captain at the time Daniel Vettori </span><br />
<span style="color: black;">was unable to stem
the flow of tweets and could only muster the odd ‘LOL’ in reply, </span><br />
<span style="color: black;">although Twitter chiefs have subsequently suggested the innovation may
be outlawed </span><br />
<span style="color: black;">entirely because it is “too entertaining”.</span></div>
<div style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', Times, serif; font-size: 14px; width: 600px;">
<span style="color: black;"><br />
Controversy continued to dog Pietersen in the following years with many
former and </span><br />
<span style="color: black;">current tweeters critical of his flamboyant writing style. He
was left red-faced, when, </span><br />
<span style="color: black;">after trying to raise a rapid-fire tweet, he
ended up misjudging the end of the sentence </span><br />
<span style="color: black;">and was unable to put in a
final full-stop, leading to accusations of selfish individualism.</span></div>
<div style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', Times, serif; font-size: 14px; width: 600px;">
<span style="color: black;"><br />
Pietersen’s many supporters nonetheless still came out and backed his style, with <i>@kingKP1987</i> saying,
“That’s just the way he tweets!!!!!! You’d be singing his </span><br />
<span style="color: black;">praises if he
had nailed it!!!! #getoverit #KPforeva”, although Sky Sports</span><br />
<span style="color: black;"> commentator @Knightsweats continued to decry KP™’s lack of team ethic.</span></div>
<div style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', Times, serif; font-size: 14px; width: 600px;">
<span style="color: black;"><br />
Pietersen has admitted he has a lot of thinking he needs to do over the
next few days.</span><br />
<span style="color: black;"> “I can’t give any assurances that my next tweet won’t be
my last. We’ll just have to see. </span><br />
<span style="color: black;">The saddest thing for me is that
supporters love reading my Twitter feed,” said the </span><br />
<span style="color: black;">controversial star.</span></div>
<div style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', Times, serif; font-size: 14px; width: 600px;">
<br /></div>
<div>
<div style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', Times, serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left; width: 600px;">
<span style="color: black;">
Pietersen has already upset the ECB with his decision to use Facebook
to express his </span><br />
<span style="color: black;">views after ODIs, rather than committing to Twitter for
all three forms of the game, </span><br />
<span style="color: black;">a move condemned by ECB chairman and
leading cheap-suit-wearer Giles Clarke:</span><br />
<span style="color: black;"> “Kevin’s desire to pick and
choose social media tools is unacceptable and all our </span><br />
<span style="color: black;">players know that
they are either all considered for Twitter, or not at all – that </span><br />
<span style="color: black;">Stanford parody account won’t retweet itself.”</span></div>
<div style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', Times, serif; font-size: 14px; width: 600px;">
<span style="color: black;"><br />
Many administrators and commentators believe that Pietersen’s decision
may be</span><br />
<span style="color: black;"> financially motivated after it was noted that he had ‘liked’ a
number of posts made by</span><br />
<span style="color: black;"> the IPL Facebook group and changed his location
to ‘Melbourne via Delhi’ on LinkedIn.</span></div>
<div style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', Times, serif; font-size: 14px; width: 600px;">
<span style="color: black;"><br />
Meanwhile, New Zealand captain Ross Taylor said that New Zealand cricket
had few</span><br />
<span style="color: black;"> such problems as most of their players were ‘fully committed’
to honouring their </span><br />
<span style="color: black;">contracts with MySpace.</span></div>
</div>
<br />
Read more: <a href="http://www.thealternativecricketalmanack.com/#ixzz24ALfUpq9" style="color: #003399;">http://www.thealternativecricketalmanack.com/#ixzz24ALfUpq9</a>Man_in_Beigehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09261862108444079448noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5279694790373398611.post-70947052125422501382012-08-21T20:05:00.000+12:002012-08-21T20:13:42.229+12:00Ross Taylor calls For More Breaks In New Zealand’s Increasingly Congested Off-Season<i><b style="font-weight: normal;">This article first appeared on <a href="http://www.thealternativecricketalmanack.com/">www.thealternativecricketalmanack.com</a>on the 1st of August 2012.</b></i><br />
<br />
<div style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', Times, serif; font-size: 14px; width: 600px;">
<span style="color: black; line-height: 28px;"><b>ANTIGUA</b>
– Black Caps captain Ross Taylor has expressed his displeasure at the</span><br />
<span style="color: black; line-height: 28px;"> ICC’s schedule which sees New Zealand’s off-season getting alarmingly
busy. </span><br />
</div>
<div style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', Times, serif; font-size: 14px; width: 600px;">
<span style="color: black; line-height: 28px;">“I
like it that my guys are pretty busy not playing much cricket for most
of the year, </span><br />
<span style="color: black; line-height: 28px;">but we have to be careful that fatigue and injury don’t set
in. We need to make it that </span><br />
<span style="color: black; line-height: 28px;">we have to find room in the calendar for a
game or two here or there to keep everyone </span><br />
<span style="color: black; line-height: 28px;">fresh,” said Taylor, chewing
on a piece of long grass.</span></div>
<div style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', Times, serif; font-size: 14px; width: 600px;">
<br /></div>
<div style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', Times, serif; font-size: 14px; width: 600px;">
<span style="color: black; line-height: 28px;">
Taylor had previously been very outspoken over the overlap between the
2013 IPL and </span><br />
<span style="color: black; line-height: 28px;">New Zealand’s tour of England stating, “What is the point
of having them both at the </span><br />
<span style="color: black; line-height: 28px;">same time? It means the guys only get one
break from not playing instead of two. This </span><br />
<span style="color: black; line-height: 28px;">doesn’t help anyone.”</span></div>
<div style="font-family: Georgia,'Times New Roman',Times,serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left; width: 600px;">
<span style="color: black; line-height: 28px;"><br /> </span></div>
<div style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', Times, serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left; width: 600px;">
<span style="color: black; line-height: 28px;">
Former New Zealand supremo Daniel Vettori also struggled with cricket
encroaching on </span><br />
<span style="color: black; line-height: 28px;">the Black Caps’ off season and said: “We tried all sorts
of things to make it work. We had</span><br />
<span style="color: black; line-height: 28px;"> a pretty good rotation policy that
meant that we kept a close eye on the guys who had </span><br />
<span style="color: black; line-height: 28px;">had really long
breaks from international cricket and we gave them a breather by </span><br />
<span style="color: black; line-height: 28px;">putting them in the squad.” This policy is thought to be responsible for the
Test </span><br />
<span style="color: black; line-height: 28px;">appearances made by Tim McIntosh and Aaron Redmond.</span></div>
<div style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', Times, serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left; width: 600px;">
<br /></div>
<div style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', Times, serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left; width: 600px;">
<span style="color: black; line-height: 28px;">
Cricket historian Dipak Ward-Square says that New Zealand just have to
get used to an </span><br />
<span style="color: black; line-height: 28px;">evolving cricketing landscape. “In the beginning, players
were involved in lengthy tours </span><br />
<span style="color: black; line-height: 28px;">that broke up their periods of
inactivity nicely and this kept fatigue down. Even in more </span><br />
<span style="color: black; line-height: 28px;">recent times
New Zealand could rely on playing nearly five Tests a year, so the gaps</span><br />
<span style="color: black; line-height: 28px;"> sorted themselves out. Those frantic days are gone however which means
the </span><br />
<span style="color: black; line-height: 28px;">off-season is getting worrying long and there are limits to how much
the human body </span><br />
<span style="color: black; line-height: 28px;">can take before it needs to do something.”</span></div>
<div style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', Times, serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left; width: 600px;">
<br /></div>
<div style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', Times, serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left; width: 600px;">
<span style="color: black; line-height: 28px;">
Other cricket teams are aware of the potential fatigue crisis facing
New Zealand. Indian </span><br />
<span style="color: black; line-height: 28px;">skipper Mahendra Singh Dhoni said “I know the
importance of avoiding off season </span><br />
<span style="color: black; line-height: 28px;">injury and tiredness. The guys are
aware of the risks, so we always schedule many tours</span><br />
<span style="color: black; line-height: 28px;"> just after our
one-week off-season. Besides, if we ever find the team has been on a
break </span><br />
<span style="color: black; line-height: 28px;">that is worryingly long we just schedule a match with Sri Lanka.”</span></div>
<div style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', Times, serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left; width: 600px;">
<br /></div>
<div style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', Times, serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left; width: 600px;">
<span style="color: black; line-height: 28px;">
Dhoni himself was forced by doctors to play ‘as many as several’
consecutive cricket</span><br />
<span style="color: black; line-height: 28px;"> games after a dangerously long three-day cricketing
absence.</span></div>
<div style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', Times, serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left; width: 600px;">
<br /></div>
<div style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', Times, serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left; width: 600px;">
<span style="color: black; line-height: 28px;">
The New Zealand team are currently relaxing in the West Indies enjoying
a rare </span><br />
<span style="color: black; line-height: 28px;">cricket tour that actually includes Test cricket. </span></div>
<div style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', Times, serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left; width: 600px;">
<br /></div>
<div style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', Times, serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left; width: 600px;">
<span style="color: black; line-height: 28px;">This
follows a hectic period lasting many months where New Zealand didn’t
tour South </span><br />
<span style="color: black; line-height: 28px;">Africa, England or India, and didn’t host Australia, Sri
Lanka or Pakistan.</span></div>
<div style="background-color: white; border: medium none; color: black; overflow: hidden; text-align: left; text-decoration: none;">
<br />
Read more: <a href="http://www.thealternativecricketalmanack.com/#ixzz24AL5Imjc" style="color: #003399;">http://www.thealternativecricketalmanack.com/#ixzz24AL5Imjc</a></div>
Man_in_Beigehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09261862108444079448noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5279694790373398611.post-50184423069502179452012-03-18T11:18:00.000+13:002012-03-18T11:18:12.047+13:00Recent Sightings Spark Fierce Debate Over Existence Of ‘Test Cricket’<i><strong style="font-weight: normal;">This article first appeared on <a href="http://www.thealternativecricketalmanack.com/">www.thealternativecricketalmanack.com</a>on the 3rd of February 2012.</strong></i><br />
<strong style="font-weight: normal;"> </strong><br />
<div style="color: black; font-family: inherit;"><strong style="font-weight: normal;">Lik</strong>e Elvis, Hitler and Cliff Richard before it, Test Cricket has long been assumed dead. However, a number of recent alleged sightings have once more led people to question whether it could actually still be alive.</div><div style="color: black; font-family: inherit;"><br />
</div><div style="color: black; font-family: inherit;">The most recent report comes from two Australian holiday-makers in Argentina, who spotted what they claim was Test Cricket working anonymously at a rural gas station.</div><div style="color: black; font-family: inherit;"><br />
</div><div style="color: black; font-family: inherit;">“My father spoke often about Test Cricket, and showed me photographs of it that he took in his youth, so I knew what it looked like even if I’d never seen it in person before,” said Brad Slater, 24. His girlfriend, Sheila Matthews, 22, spoke of its ‘quiet dignity’, adding: “It was so beautiful. All the cricket I get to see is loud and tacky, and always trying to grope me on the bum. But Test Cricket was so engrossing, I could have sat and watching it do its thing for, like, five days.”</div><div style="background-color: white; border: medium none; color: black; font-family: inherit; overflow: hidden; text-align: left; text-decoration: none;"><br />
</div><div style="background-color: white; border: medium none; color: black; font-family: inherit; overflow: hidden; text-align: left; text-decoration: none;">The claims have met with considerable scepticism, with the main international experts in Test Cricket sightings, IPL Investigations, dismissing them completely.<br />
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Spokesperson for IPL Investigations, Lord Lucan, stated: “Test Cricket is dead. It is a shame, but people just have to accept facts. We see no evidence for Test Cricket being alive. We spoke to Twenty20 Cricket yesterday and it wishes people would stop bringing up its grandfather and let the dead rest.”<br />
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Lord Lucan proceeded to leap onto his horse, Shergar, and galloped off into the night.<br />
<div style="background-color: white; border: medium none; overflow: hidden; text-align: left; text-decoration: none;"></div><div style="background-color: white; border: medium none; overflow: hidden; text-align: left; text-decoration: none;"><br />
</div></div><div style="background-color: white; border: medium none; color: black; font-family: inherit; overflow: hidden; text-align: left; text-decoration: none;">The controversy rages on, however, with sightings of Test Cricket coming in from all corners of the globe. Even in New Zealand, where there hasn’t even been a potential sighting since the late 1980s, there has been a spate of claims in the last couple of months. Such excitement has lead to crowds of up to 7 people at a time flocking to cricket grounds around the country.<br />
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IPL Investigations have warned the public that not all sightings will be genuine, and to not get their hopes up too quickly. In one such high-profile case in 2006-07, a group of English tourists claimed that Test Cricket was alive and well during a short stay in Adelaide. However, just like Sachin’s 100th 100, it turned out to be nothing other than a false sighting.<br />
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Even in the United States of America, dozens of sightings are reported each year, usually at night, and by individuals driving on isolated roads where there are, frustratingly, no other witnesses.<br />
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In December 2011, Lurlene Jackson, 53, phoned the emergency services after believing that she had been abducted by Test Cricket. “It was terrifying,” stated Ms. Jackson. “I was asked the most degrading and personal questions, and shown images of unspeakable horror.” IPL Investigations concluded that Ms. Jackson was not visited by Test Cricket, but was actually just being sent text messages by Shane Warne.</div>Man_in_Beigehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09261862108444079448noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5279694790373398611.post-62672202419094284462012-02-09T19:41:00.001+13:002012-03-18T11:24:17.383+13:00Tendulkar dropped - selectors frustrated by 'unfulfilled potential'<b style="font-weight: normal;"></b><i>This article first appeared on <a href="http://www.thealternativecricketalmanack.com/">www.thealternativecricketalmanack.com</a> on the 26th of January, 2012.</i><br />
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<div style="color: black; font-family: inherit;">India’s cricket selectors today finally decided that enough was enough and have dropped Sachin Tendulkar from all forms of the game, with immediate effect. “We have given him countless opportunities to justify our faith in him, but he just doesn’t seem to be able to translate his obvious talent into meaningful contributions with the bat,” said the chairman of selectors Kris Srikkanth. “ He needs to get a bit more cricket under his belt at First Class level. Maybe work on his technique a little.”</div><div style="color: black; font-family: inherit;"><br />
</div><div style="color: black; font-family: inherit;">Tendulkar isn’t the first cricketer to disappoint at international level – other high-profile failures include Brian Lara, Muttiah Murilitharan and Sir Donald Bradman. Bradman, despite early promise, was dropped after being totally bereft of form from 1939-1945 where he failed to score a single international run.</div><div style="color: black; font-family: inherit;"><br />
</div><div style="color: black; font-family: inherit;">Srikkanth confirmed that the decision was not one that the BCCI took lightly, and that the selectors had employed statisticians from the highly prestigious Institute of Sehwagology in Vienna. A spokesperson for the Institute said: “The final nail in Tendulkar’s coffin is that when you exclude every innings where he has scored runs, he has now managed 34 ducks in a row. That is a pretty significant drought right there.”</div><div style="background-color: white; border: medium none; color: black; font-family: inherit; overflow: hidden; text-align: left; text-decoration: none;"><br />
</div><div style="background-color: white; border: medium none; color: black; font-family: inherit; overflow: hidden; text-align: left; text-decoration: none;">To put matters into perspective, New Zealand’s Chris Martin has also scored 34 international ducks. However, such a comparison has been met with criticism, as Tendulkar is generally considered a batsman, whilst Martin is considered by most New Zealanders to count as more of an all-rounder.<br />
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Additionally, when Tendulkar started his One Day International career, he averaged just 0.0 under then captain Srikkanth. Srikkanth has now admitted that this poor form back in 1989 did get the alarm bells ringing, and prompt action has ensured that the underperforming Tendulkar was only given a further 452 one day games until being axed.<br />
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<strong>Other</strong> <strong>statistical facts</strong> used in the final decision include…<br />
<ul><li>Tendulkar has scored a total of 10 international Twenty20 runs. This is less than half the number scored by Canada’s Mohammed Iqbal and Scotland’s Simon Smith.</li>
</ul><ul><li>In 2010, Tendulkar scored just 204 ODI runs. He played 2 innings and in one of these innings he failed miserably and got just 4. Details of the other innings are unknown at this stage.</li>
</ul><ul><li>Tendulkar averages just 40.0 in Tests played in Zimbabwe. This is considerably lower than South Africa’s Jacques Kallis who averages a useful 503.0 in Zimbabwe.</li>
</ul><ul><li>Tendulkar has failed to make a meaningful contribution in any Ashes test matches. This is a characteristic Tendulkar shares with many other cricketers such as Ravi Bopara and Phil Hughes.</li>
</ul><br />
As a 24-year old upstart, Tendulkar is said to be “disappointed” with the decision and looks forward to impressing at domestic level and trying to force his way back into the top team. However, it is expected that he is going to struggle to be anything more than a footnote in the annals of international cricket.</div>Man_in_Beigehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09261862108444079448noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5279694790373398611.post-9551651096104604192012-01-28T19:53:00.001+13:002012-03-18T11:21:20.499+13:00Lost Gate Receipts Will ‘Cripple’ Australia in the Long-Term, Claims Dhoni<i>This article first appeared on <a href="http://www.thealternativecricketalmanack.com/">www.thealternativecricketalmanack.com</a> on January 14, 2012.</i><br />
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<div style="color: black; font-family: inherit;">Indian cricket captain MS Dhoni sent shockwaves throughout the cricketing world today when he outlined the real strategy he had in place during the seemingly disastrous tour of Australia.</div><div style="color: black; font-family: inherit;"><br />
</div><div style="color: black; font-family: inherit;">At a hastily convened press conference, Dhoni said that by losing to Australia consistently within 3 or 4 days, the lost income through gate receipts would ruin Cricket Australia, forcing their top players out of the team.</div><div style="color: black; font-family: inherit;"><br />
</div><div style="color: black; font-family: inherit;">“I’m saddened so many people have been critical of my on and off-field leadership,” continued Dhoni. “Yes, I could have tinkered with the batting line-up, or actually employed attacking fields when the Australian tail was batting, but the simple truth is that the current Australian line-up has foolishly stepped into my trap. I project that the money that Cricket Australia has lost so far will be enough to force them to have to rent out the WACA to farmers during the winter, just to stay afloat.”</div><div style="background-color: white; border: medium none; color: black; font-family: inherit; overflow: hidden; text-align: left; text-decoration: none;"><br />
Former Australian captain Ian Chappell was quick to congratulate Dhoni on his vision and his ability to consider his side’s long-term prospects over simply papering over the cracks. “Like a lot of people, I thought that this tour was going pretty badly for India. However, Dhoni has taken advantage of an Australian side with a young, inexperienced captain and who are hurting after a humiliating loss to New Zealand. So in their eagerness to impress, they have run headfirst into Dhoni’s trap. Brilliant.”<br />
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It is only now that historic parallels to this plan can be observed. When Australia ruled cricket throughout the 1990s and beyond, other sides had subtly and slowly chipped away at Australia’s finances through massive, but strategic, losses. Whereas it may be easy to claim Australia’s drop down the rankings can be attributed to the successive retirements of McGrath, Hayden, Langer, Warne and Gilchrist the truth was Australia could no longer afford these players and they were forced to seek out poorly-paid work, such as the IPL.<br />
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“So you see, having lots of world-class players retiring at once with untried replacements struggling to get experience was not the issue for Australia. I think we can all take comfort from that and never mention it again,” concluded Dhoni.<br />
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Dhoni then proudly and confidently strode off the stage and slammed the door behind him, eliminating the possibility of questions. Most commentators applaud Dhoni’s commitment for holding out for six hours, before acknowledging that he’d actually shut himself into a broom closet.</div>Man_in_Beigehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09261862108444079448noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5279694790373398611.post-38328502202367930652012-01-12T12:44:00.000+13:002012-01-12T12:44:08.178+13:00South Africa shake off ‘Chokers’ tag after tight 258 run win<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml> <w:WordDocument> <w:View>Normal</w:View> <w:Zoom>0</w:Zoom> <w:TrackMoves/> <w:TrackFormatting/> <w:PunctuationKerning/> <w:ValidateAgainstSchemas/> <w:SaveIfXMLInvalid>false</w:SaveIfXMLInvalid> <w:IgnoreMixedContent>false</w:IgnoreMixedContent> <w:AlwaysShowPlaceholderText>false</w:AlwaysShowPlaceholderText> <w:DoNotPromoteQF/> <w:LidThemeOther>EN-NZ</w:LidThemeOther> <w:LidThemeAsian>X-NONE</w:LidThemeAsian> <w:LidThemeComplexScript>X-NONE</w:LidThemeComplexScript> <w:Compatibility> <w:BreakWrappedTables/> <w:SnapToGridInCell/> <w:WrapTextWithPunct/> <w:UseAsianBreakRules/> <w:DontGrowAutofit/> <w:SplitPgBreakAndParaMark/> <w:DontVertAlignCellWithSp/> <w:DontBreakConstrainedForcedTables/> <w:DontVertAlignInTxbx/> <w:Word11KerningPairs/> <w:CachedColBalance/> </w:Compatibility> <w:BrowserLevel>MicrosoftInternetExplorer4</w:BrowserLevel> <m:mathPr> <m:mathFont m:val="Cambria Math"/> <m:brkBin m:val="before"/> <m:brkBinSub m:val="--"/> <m:smallFrac m:val="off"/> <m:dispDef/> <m:lMargin m:val="0"/> <m:rMargin m:val="0"/> <m:defJc m:val="centerGroup"/> <m:wrapIndent m:val="1440"/> <m:intLim m:val="subSup"/> <m:naryLim m:val="undOvr"/> </m:mathPr></w:WordDocument> </xml><![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 9]><xml> <w:LatentStyles DefLockedState="false" DefUnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<div class="MsoNormal">South Africa threw off their long-held mantle of being a team of chokers in emphatic style after a nail-biting victory over Sri Lanka yesterday. South Africa had been cruising to victory when a 10-run partnership between Kosala Kulasekara and Ajantha Mendis started alarm bells ringing throughout the South African camp.</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">In previous years, it may have been expected that South Africa would have crumbled under the pressure and that Sri Lanka, the World Cup finalists, would have knocked off the remaining runs with ease. However, the new South Africa, under the steely leadership of captain AB de Villiers, ensured that defeat was not snatched from the jaws of victory this time and South Africa held their nerve to record a 258 run win with just 179 balls remaining. </div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">Hashim Amla, who top scored for the hosts with 112, said, “When we had them 13/6 we were feeling pretty confident. However, their next 3 partnerships all got into double figures and I could see some of the shoulders starting to slump around the team. I was getting really tense when they got to 43/9.”</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">However, de Villiers wasn't throwing in the towel just yet. “We were getting fairly anxious at 43/9, especially since Sri Lanka had really started accelerating and had got the run-rate above 2.1. However, I told the guys that if we kept to our game plan and kept our focus then we had a great chance to stop Sri Lanka’s number 10 and 11 from scoring 260 runs at 8.5 an over.”</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">The plan was successful, and despite some tense moments when there was a dot ball, South Africa finally prised out Sri Lanka’s number 11 Dilhara Fernando. At the moment of victory, the reaction of the players on the two sides could not have been more different with the South African players overcome with relief and the Sri Lankan players in anguish over what might have been.</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">Sri Lankan captain Tillakaratne Dilshan was quick to praise the hosts, saying, “Full credit to South Africa, they held their nerve after we had pulled ourselves back into the game. I feel sorry for [Kosala] Kalusekara as he did an amazing job in getting to 19. Such a shame that innings had to come in a losing cause, but that is the nature of cricket.”</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">Most commentators agree that this match was the most exciting and close One Day International of 2012 so far.</div>Man_in_Beigehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09261862108444079448noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5279694790373398611.post-43536857383277815062011-11-30T19:36:00.000+13:002011-11-30T19:36:49.056+13:00My Favourite Cricketer - Gavin LarsenThe excellent folk over at <a href="http://www.balancedsports.com/">www.balancedsports.com</a> asked me to contribute to their 'My Favourite Cricketer' series. Naturally, I jumped at the chance.<br />
<br />
Check out my gushing tribute to New Zealand's best ever One Day bowler - Gavin Larsen. No seriously, he really is.<br />
<br />
<a href="http://balancedsports.blogspot.com/2011/11/my-favourite-cricketer-gavin-larsen-by.html">My Favourite Cricketer - Gavin Larsen</a><br />
<br />
Check out the other articles in the series too. All better written and more informed than mine for starters.Man_in_Beigehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09261862108444079448noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5279694790373398611.post-10104943619030317462011-11-14T21:27:00.000+13:002011-11-14T21:27:54.202+13:00Taylor defiant ahead of Australia series: “We might not lose both games by an innings”.<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml> <w:WordDocument> <w:View>Normal</w:View> <w:Zoom>0</w:Zoom> <w:TrackMoves/> <w:TrackFormatting/> <w:PunctuationKerning/> <w:ValidateAgainstSchemas/> <w:SaveIfXMLInvalid>false</w:SaveIfXMLInvalid> <w:IgnoreMixedContent>false</w:IgnoreMixedContent> <w:AlwaysShowPlaceholderText>false</w:AlwaysShowPlaceholderText> <w:DoNotPromoteQF/> <w:LidThemeOther>EN-NZ</w:LidThemeOther> <w:LidThemeAsian>X-NONE</w:LidThemeAsian> <w:LidThemeComplexScript>X-NONE</w:LidThemeComplexScript> <w:Compatibility> <w:BreakWrappedTables/> <w:SnapToGridInCell/> <w:WrapTextWithPunct/> <w:UseAsianBreakRules/> <w:DontGrowAutofit/> <w:SplitPgBreakAndParaMark/> <w:DontVertAlignCellWithSp/> <w:DontBreakConstrainedForcedTables/> <w:DontVertAlignInTxbx/> <w:Word11KerningPairs/> <w:CachedColBalance/> </w:Compatibility> <w:BrowserLevel>MicrosoftInternetExplorer4</w:BrowserLevel> <m:mathPr> <m:mathFont m:val="Cambria Math"/> <m:brkBin m:val="before"/> <m:brkBinSub m:val="--"/> <m:smallFrac m:val="off"/> <m:dispDef/> <m:lMargin m:val="0"/> <m:rMargin m:val="0"/> <m:defJc m:val="centerGroup"/> <m:wrapIndent m:val="1440"/> <m:intLim m:val="subSup"/> <m:naryLim m:val="undOvr"/> </m:mathPr></w:WordDocument> </xml><![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 9]><xml> <w:LatentStyles DefLockedState="false" DefUnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<div class="MsoNormal">Black Caps skipper Ross Taylor has come out with some very confident words just days before the start of the two Test match trans-Tasman clash. Taylor, speaking to journalists at the Vettori Institute of Cricket, had been watching Australia’s display with the bat against South Africa and stated that this was New Zealand’s finest opportunity to sneak a draw in a generation.</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">“I was watching the panic setting in as they stumbled to 21/9 in the second innings,” said Taylor with a smile. “They will be worried about that lack of focus, and if it happens again then we might just chip away often enough for them to delay their inevitable declaration for long enough that we can bat out a draw.”</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">Taylor’s bold claims have been met with some negativity from cricket commentators around the world. “I’m all for captain’s saying that they are looking to bat for a draw. That is an admirable goal.” said former England captain Geoff Boycott. “But don’t get cocky. These Kiwi lads are best with their backs to the wall and with nothing to lose. All this confidence will come back to haunt them. Listen to me, I’m important”.</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">Another former England skipper, Tony Greig, was also quick to encourage the Black Caps to show more restraint. “I know a thing or two about making ridiculously confident claims before a big series. My advice is to not even talk to the media. Ever. About anything.” Reporters here at <i>The Daily Beige</i> are unable to pinpoint exactly which series he is talking about but it is suspected it refers to the 1976/77 tour of India which England won 3-1 despite Greig embarrassingly boasting of a 4-1 victory beforehand.</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">Eyebrows were raised further when New Zealand’s most successful Test opener in months, Martin Guptill, weighed in with a claim that he thought there was a great chance for the Australian’s to claim the lowest test total off New Zealand. Most commentators agree that it is possible the lowest score will be broken, but that it is unlikely to change countries any time soon.</div>Man_in_Beigehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09261862108444079448noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5279694790373398611.post-22920814772762469812011-03-29T23:01:00.000+13:002011-03-29T23:01:24.899+13:00The Beige Archives: Historic History: 1932 - Scientists outline ‘Fast Leg Theory'<div class="postbody"><div class="content"><em>This article first appeared on cricket-match-special.com on the 15th of November 2010.</em></div><div class="content"> </div><div class="content">Scientists from England were hailed as the heroes of the War of the Ashes fought between England and Australia in 1932-1933 after they published a paper on the ‘Unified Theory of Fast Leg’. In the run up to the Ashes conflict, scientists from both countries had been working round the clock to develop ways in which to gain an advantage over their opposition, and historians from both sides agree that England’s victory in the race for scientific dominance was crucial in undermining the power of Australia’s flagship destroyer, the HMS Bradman.<br />
<br />
However, boffins from Australia were not impressed by the details of the theory and a formal response printed in the renowned ‘Australian Journal of Physics, Chemistry and Cricket’ stated that “this theory is based on a series of flawed assumptions and is not in the spirit of Newton’s second law of Thermodynamics”. Despite this, the theory was employed to great effect during the war and after each day the bodies of fallen Australians were laid out in a line, giving the theory its common nickname of ‘Lines of Bodies’. The invading English army was successful in their campaign and returned to England with their small urn-shaped spoils.<br />
<br />
Throughout 1933, Australian scientists continued to provide evidence of algebraic irregularities proposed in the Unified Fast Leg Theory with General Stan McCabe saying “The Bay 13 infantry may break the odd rule, but even they know not to mess with Euler’s laws of rigid body motion”. The international scientific community eventually agreed and the universe’s physical laws were amended so that England’s Fast Leg Theory became illegal and ceased to be employed on the cricketing battlefield.<br />
<br />
The fundamentals of the law were reused, however, in the Allies’ successful Battle of Britain campaign with a huge number of the Luftwaffe pilots falling for the leg side trap.</div></div>Man_in_Beigehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09261862108444079448noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5279694790373398611.post-67690202502419632312011-03-29T22:59:00.000+13:002011-03-29T22:59:30.998+13:00The Beige Archives: Draw with India leaves New Zealand fans 'confused'<em>This article first appeared on cricket-match-special.com on the 9th of November 2010.</em><br />
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<div class="content">The drawn test match between lowly ranked New Zealand against number 1 ranked India has left almost every New Zealand fan 'confused' as to how to react.<br />
<br />
"Given the slightly below average performance in Balngladesh I was fully expecting India to crack the thousand mark in their first innings." said one life-long cricket fan in Auckland earlier today. "Me and my mates were watching and looking forward to being able to throw some clever and devastating insults at the Black Caps for a solid 5 days, but events on days 2 and 3 completely threw us off our stride and we got all confused and it wasn't enjoyable at all."<br />
<br />
Worse was to come though as the Black Caps, inspired by a man dressed in a Chris Martin costume, took the advantage on Day 4 and were in with a great chance of stealing a massive upset going into Day 5.<br />
<br />
This resulted in many fans throwing off their traditional mantles of doom and gloom and actually supporting their team for once in what has been described as the biggest show of unity in New Zealand cricket since angry mobs chased John Bracewell out of the country.<br />
<br />
However, the final day belonged to just two players - Brendan McCullum and Ross Taylor who assured New Zealand cricket fans that the bowling woes were finally over. A couple of Indian batsmen also scored some runs.<br />
<br />
As a result the fans new found optimism was quickly replaced by uncertainty over how the result was supposed to make people feel. The mood was summed up by a national paper's headline being "We Drew! Yay?". However, the article largely went unread as it was buried on page 28 behind 67 articles discussing the 2011 Rugby World Cup.</div>Man_in_Beigehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09261862108444079448noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5279694790373398611.post-29704554788325388982011-03-29T22:55:00.000+13:002011-03-29T22:55:29.762+13:00The Beige Archives: Cricket Journalism enters 'Golden Age'<em>This article first appeared on cricket-match-special.com on the 28th of October 2010.</em><br />
<br />
Cricket fans have heralded the start of a ‘golden age’ of cricket journalism after a recent influx of insightful and detailed articles on the sport. A well known Cricket Information website lead the charge earlier this week with the headline “Broken Thumb hurts Katich”.<br />
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“This kind of intellectual rigour and analysis is what has been missing from the reporting of cricket stories,” enthused an ICC spokesperson earlier today. “Headlines like this are really putting cricket on the cutting edge of modern sports commentating”. Cricket has long languished well behind other sports in terms of eye-catching headlines, although the 2002 headline “Nobody Caresses Balls Like Vaughan” attracted a huge amount of interest and won the coveted “Article Not Quite Living Up to Its Promise” award.<br />
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In other news, the same website’s commitment to Top XI lists has been praised as comprehensive and vital. Their upcoming list of the top XI lists has been described as ‘the icing on the cake’.<br />
<br />
However, not everyone is happy with a number of comments on forums expressing outrage that Sachin Tendulkar was not included in the top XI cricketers in the All-time lists for Australia or England.Man_in_Beigehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09261862108444079448noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5279694790373398611.post-65743783352761671092011-03-29T22:51:00.000+13:002011-03-29T22:51:21.080+13:00The Beige Archives: Popular Soap Opera 'IPL' Starts Fourth Series<div class="content"><em>This article first appeared on cricket-match-special.com on the 11th of October 2010.</em></div><div class="content"> </div><div class="content">Popular Indian soap opera ‘IPL’ starts its fourth series soon and early indications are that it will rival the record breaking ratings at the end of the third season which were due in part to the ‘whodunnit’ storyline involving Lalit Modi (brilliantly played by journeyman character actor Lalit Modi).<br />
<br />
However, there has been friction between some of the key players with both Rajasthan and Punjab expecting to be missing from the fourth series. Rajasthan, the surprisingly popular underdog from series one, has been inundated with job offers and rumours are growing that it will star in the new Harry Potter film.<br />
<br />
Punjab’s agent is citing ‘creative differences’ and stated that “Punjab just doesn’t like the direction the creators are taking IPL and we believe the IPL is moving away from its roots”.<br />
<br />
In a further twist, there is speculation that a third major participant might be missing from the hit show. Newcomer Kochi has been absent from recent rehearsals and sources inside the IPL studio say that it is possible the character of Kochi might remain, but could be replaced by a different actor. Commentators agree that the IPL series was long overdue for such a common soap opera tactic.<br />
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The IPL series is almost unique amongst soap operas in that it is still filmed in front of a live audience. Given how these audience numbers have dwindled since series one, this may soon change.</div>Man_in_Beigehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09261862108444079448noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5279694790373398611.post-7918416890691232832011-03-29T22:48:00.000+13:002011-03-29T22:48:08.546+13:00The Beige Archives: Historic Moments in History - 1981: Chappell Invents Bowls<em>This article first appeared on cricket-match-special.com on the 22nd of August 2010.</em><br />
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<br />
<div class="content">On the 1st of February 1981, Australian brothers Greg and Trevor Chappell invented the game of lawn bowls during a one-day international cricket match against New Zealand.<br />
<br />
When asked how he got the idea, Greg said "a number of my friends had been joking and asking me whether there was a slower and more boring game than cricket and it just came to me".<br />
<br />
New Zealand batsman Brian McKechnie was to face the final delivery of the match when Trevor Chappell switched from cricket to bowls unexpectedly. McKechnie remembers the incident like it was yesterday. "I was thinking that I was going to have to hit a six and it would be a massive win for us. Then Trevor walked in and introduced the world to bowls. The first thing that went through my head was "man, I wish I'd invented that"".<br />
<br />
The historic moment has had ongoing repurcussions for a number of the participants. Trevor Chappell has expressed his disappointment that he is remembered as "The Bowls Guy" and no-one remembers his distinctly average cricketing ability.<br />
<br />
The story has a dark side unfortunately. The batsman at the non-strikers end, Bruce Edgar slipped into obscurity and suffers from depression. "Why does no-one remember my contribution to the game and the incident?" he said recently. "I had one of the best views of Trevor's technique but I never get asked to join any bowls clubs. And I was in the famous photo! I didn't even get a free meal out of that".</div>Man_in_Beigehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09261862108444079448noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5279694790373398611.post-14529750053372785822011-03-29T22:44:00.000+13:002011-03-29T22:44:40.883+13:00The Beige Archives: Ryder to commit to international cricket - or beer<em>This article first appeared on cricket-match-special.com on the 7th of August 2010.</em><br />
<br />
Jesse Ryder stands at a crossroads of his career today as he mulls over whether to commit himself fully to professional cricket or being a world famous drunken lout. Ryder, the Black Caps first dual international since Jeff Wilson played both rugby and cricket for his country, has recently conceded he was finding it difficult to maintain the standards he set for himself in both disciplines and was thinking about which one he wanted to focus on.<br />
<br />
New Zealand Cricket’s Ruler for Life Daniel Vettori said he hoped Ryder would pick cricket and admitted that “we need him. We have no openers whatsoever. No offence Tim [McIntosh]”. He even pledged support for McIntosh and Watling for them to become international beer-swilling superstars and offered them “all the kegs they need” to get started.<br />
<br />
Ryder does have support as a dual international from Australian batsman and big drinker David Boon. “I managed to maintain both careers to a high standard for a number of years” said Boon. “Of course, I don’t remember any of it, but I do have a number of momentos including a traffic cone and a 'Give Way' sign"<br />
<br />
Boon came to fame when he drank 716 cans of lager on a flight from Brisbane to Sydney.Man_in_Beigehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09261862108444079448noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5279694790373398611.post-78582439661739877042011-03-29T22:41:00.001+13:002011-04-09T20:11:32.683+12:00The Beige Archives: England Twenty20 win "my greatest trick yet" - David Blaine<div class="content"><em>This article first appeared on cricket-match-special.com on the 18th of May 2010.</em></div><div class="content"></div><div class="content">Illusionist David Blaine has claimed that his skills with magic have fooled the world into believing England are the world's best Twenty20 side.<br />
<br />
"Last year, they lost more games than they won and did nothing in either of the previous two championships." drawled Blaine from the inside of a toaster. "But using my skills I have, over the last two weeks, constructed an elaborate tapestry of wonder and have created my most outlandish stunt to date. I, David Blaine, have made England appear to be a formidable Twenty20 cricketing unit".<br />
<br />
Some were quick to seize upon this explanation for England's victory: "Yes! It's a trick! It has to be a trick. No way they could have won otherwise. No way. No way at all." gabbled a distraught Michael Clarke as he was bundled unceremoniously into the boot of the Australian team's coach.<br />
<br />
There were some who were skeptical of Blaine's boasts however.<br />
<br />
"This is just another example of him claiming to do something physically impossible when there must be a more rational explanation." said former England captain Nasser Hussain. "People will always look to the mystical or supernatural to explain the unexplainable but maybe, just maybe, for the first time in history England actually had a great limited overs side".<br />
<br />
Hussain has since been detained in a maximum security mental health facility.</div>Man_in_Beigehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09261862108444079448noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5279694790373398611.post-34182409339480902452011-03-29T22:37:00.000+13:002011-03-29T22:37:10.948+13:00The Beige Archives: Vettori blames "lack of injury woes"<div class="content"><em>This article first appeared on cricket-match-special.com on the 11th of May 2010.</em></div><div class="content"> </div><div class="content">New Zealand cricket mastermind Daniel Vettori has blasted his players for their lack of injuries and has claimed that this directly led to their elimination from the 2010 World Twenty20 championships at the Super 8 stage.<br />
<br />
"As a NZ selector, I've long had the relatively straightforward job of just picking the 11 least unfit players in the country." fumed Vettori. "This normally meant picking a couple of batsmen, a couple of bowlers and the rest basically being specialist fielders with the odd spectator who happened to be at the ground roped in for good measure".<br />
<br />
However, with New Zealand having a fit squad of 15 players for the tournament, Vettori and his team of auxiliary back-up selectors were left with the unfamiliar role of actually having to select a team.<br />
<br />
"I had to worry about team balance and it was all very unfamiliar and confusing." Vettori continued "I'll be giving the guys a good grilling - we can't have them all being fit at the same time. That's just as bad as having the guys all having a good game at the same time, it just isn't right. Fortunately, we didn't have that problem this tournament".<br />
<br />
Vettori declined to comment over whether NZ would introduce unfitness training sessions. He also declined to comment whether these would be lead by Jesse Ryder.</div>Man_in_Beigehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09261862108444079448noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5279694790373398611.post-80795635944292484332011-03-29T22:34:00.000+13:002011-03-29T22:34:20.093+13:00The Beige Archives: Modi brought down by "those pesky kids"<div class="content"><em>This article first appeared on cricket-match-special.com on the 27th of April 2010.</em></div><div class="content"> </div><div class="content">Beleaguered IPL Chairman Lalit Modi has proclaimed that he "would have got away with it if it hadn't been for those meddling kids" in reference to the initial investigations into his finances that were undertaken by a group of teenagers and their pet dog Scooby Doo.<br />
<br />
Fred, the spokesperson for the group (known as 'Mystery, Inc'), said “We started off just looking into claims that Chinnaswamy Stadium was haunted, but that just turned out to be a man in a sheet. However, while being chased along pointlessly long corridors again, Shaggy and Scooby came across a couple of files in an office. It all kind of escalated from there”. <br />
<br />
Modi was very vocal in what he felt was a complete lack of focus by the media on the real story. “Why are people so interested in my financial dealings?” he asked incredulously, “there is a TALKING DOG in the courtroom for %*#@s sake!”<br />
<br />
Shaggy was unavailable for comment as police were speaking to him in regards to a number of drug related offences.</div>Man_in_Beigehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09261862108444079448noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5279694790373398611.post-85597399836087891032011-03-29T22:30:00.000+13:002011-03-29T22:30:40.266+13:00The Beige Archives: Referral system "incomprehensible - say Duckworth & Lewis<div class="content"><em>This article first appeared on cricket-match-special.com on the 21st of March 2010.</em></div><div class="content"> </div><div class="content">The cricket referral system has been slammed by Frank Duckworth and Tony Lewis, the joint heads of the ICC's Department of Accessible Rulings. "I just don't understand why it is so complicated and open to misinterpretation" said Duckworth earlier today.<br />
<br />
Duckworth and Lewis came to fame in 1997 when they developed a formula for predicting which side would be the most confused by their Duckworth-Lewis system that had been introduced the previous year. Since then they have spent their time writing haikus explaining the LBW laws.<br />
<br />
The referral system has been criticised by many players since it was first introduced in 2009, but it has been supported by New Zealand cricket supremo Daniel Vettori who said “controversies with this system deflect attention from our awful batting. Long may it continue. Er, the deflecting of attention that is – not our awful batting.”<br />
<br />
However, most commentators believe that the referral system would improve long before New Zealand’s batting. Even the Duckworth Lewis system predicts this, but it enigmatically adds that by 2012 Mike Gatting would wear a goat as a hat.</div>Man_in_Beigehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09261862108444079448noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5279694790373398611.post-40124502239853391472011-03-29T22:23:00.001+13:002011-03-29T22:26:47.991+13:00The Beige Archives: Umpires defend 'Helmet of God' dismissal<div class="content"><em>This article first appeared on cricket-match-special.com on the 13th March 2010.</em></div><div class="content"></div><div class="content">Umpire Gary Baxter has quickly defended his decision to allow Australian captain Ricky Ponting to be caught behind off his helmet. "It is very simple", said Baxter at the post-game conference, "Both myself and [co-umpire Asad Rauf] agreed before the match to not take this game too seriously since it was a dead rubber and instead spent most of the game checking the score in the England-Bangladesh test on our I-phones".<br />
<br />
This remarkably frank admission does go some way to explain the almost completely random umpiring that occurred during the game, with there being some speculation that every time a wicket fell in the Test, the umpires would shout "That's out!" and whichever hapless Australian was at the wicket had to make his bemused way back to the pavillion.<br />
<br />
New Zealand cricket kingpin Dan Vettori denied any allegations of threatening umpires using hired goons (a.k.a. Jesse Ryder) and instead said that "fear doesn't breed that kind of bizarre incompetence. ICC training is needed for that". <br />
<br />
Ricky Ponting declined to comment saying "I'm not one to talk about the performance of the umpires".</div>Man_in_Beigehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09261862108444079448noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5279694790373398611.post-18372552361709579792011-03-29T22:20:00.001+13:002011-03-29T22:26:20.668+13:00The Beige Archives: Guptill & McCullum score 1 run for every spectator<em>This article first appeared on cricket-match-special.com on the 16th of February 2010.</em><br />
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<div class="content">New Zealand cricketers Martin Guptill and Brendon McCullum paid tribute to the throngs of fans at Hamilton's Seddon Park by recording a partnership worth 1 run for each spectator. Starting the day with a partnership of exactly 100, Guptill and McCullum were humbled by the packed crowds who had come to watch the one-off test against Bangladesh and decided to do everything they could to repay the loyalty of all of the 341 supporters who were pressed into the ground.<br />
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"I was nearly late for the start as there were just so many people around the park pressing to get in." said McCullum. "It was so great to see so many people coming out to watch us and the Bangladeshi cricketers".<br />
<br />
Bangladesh captain Shakib al Hasan said the noise that the massive crowd was making made it hard for him to communicate properly to his bowlers and fielders. "I was telling the bowlers to not give the batsmen any width and to bowl full, but they just couldn't hear me at all".<br />
<br />
New Zealand Cricket Chief Executive Daniel Vettori said he was 'delighted' at the turn-out. "People said we were shooting ourselves in the foot by not having a single day of this test on the weekend and the turnout shows the fans have clearly voted with their feet".<br />
<br />
Australian cricket captain Ricky Ponting has expressed concern over a similar tribute being planned by the New Zealand batsmen when his side tours later this month.</div>Man_in_Beigehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09261862108444079448noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5279694790373398611.post-15982955662525947832011-03-29T22:17:00.002+13:002011-03-29T22:25:55.159+13:00The Beige Archives: Afridi reveals addiction to cricket balls<div class="content"><em>This article first appeared on cricket-match-special.com on the 1st of February 2010.</em><br />
</div><div class="content"></div><div class="content">Pakistan cricket captain Shahid Afridi shocked the cricket world today when he admitted he was fighting a lifelong battle with cricket ball addiction. Afridi broke down during the post-match interview of today's loss to Australia when he was shown footage of himself taking several bites into the ball between deliveries.<br />
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"I thought I had this addiction beat", said Afridi, "but the tense match situation got to me and I cracked. Even though I knew that there were about 30 cameras on me and several hundred million people watching at home I thought I could get away with a nibble or two."<br />
<br />
Afridi revealed that in his early career he was getting through 2 Dukes and 3 Kookaburra balls a day and that his preferred method of coping when batting was to hit the ball as far away from himself as possible. In more recent times he has instead preferred to get out early and avoid temptation completely.<br />
<br />
However, Afridi isn't the only cricketer to have suffered from this condition. Former England skipper Michael Atherton revealed that he was once so addicted to cricket balls that he had to rub dirt into them to make them less appetising.</div>Man_in_Beigehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09261862108444079448noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5279694790373398611.post-84522849570824488702011-03-29T22:14:00.001+13:002011-03-29T22:24:45.271+13:00The Beige Archives: "Richards ahead of Sehwag" - says dictionary<em>This article first appeared on cricket-match-special.com on the 17th of December 2009.</em><br />
<br />
The current debate as to whether India’s Virender Sehwag is better than former West Indian player Viv Richards came to a sudden halt today when a spokesperson for the Oxford English Dictionary revealed that, according to the current alphabet, Richards is indeed ahead of Sehwag.<br />
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“A lot of people have brought up strike rate, or batting average, or intangible factors such as ‘wow factor’, ‘destructive capabilities’ and such like, but alphabetical order is irrefutable.” said OED chief editor John Simpson. “Richards is about 11,453 places above Sehwag in fact. Fairly conclusive if you ask me”.<br />
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Supporters of Richards welcomed the news saying that “common sense has prevailed” and that “everyone can now go back to arguing about Ponting and Tendulkar”.<br />
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Whilst most Sehwag fans have accepted the result in good grace and have conceded defeat, a small group of Fundamental Sehwagologists refuse to surrender and have locked themselves up in an armed compound in Texas.<br />
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The ICC's military division has declared that they intend to neutralise the resistance by dropping 10,000 copies of the dictionary on the site, all of which will have the two cricketers' names highlighted in yellow. This action was hailed as the most useful thing the ICC have done in a decade.<br />
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After the OED ruling was announced, former Australian batsman Mark Waugh was heard to say “Alphabetical ordering? Just wait til I tell Steve”.Man_in_Beigehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09261862108444079448noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5279694790373398611.post-52886933004932849842011-03-29T22:09:00.001+13:002011-03-29T22:24:22.792+13:00The Beige Archives: Swann considers bowling via Twitter<div class="entry"><em>This article first appeared on cricket-match-special.com on the 17th of November 2009.</em><br />
<br />
England spinner Graeme Swann announced today his intention to start bowling through the medium of Twitter. The announcement, appropriately made through his Twitter feed, signals a potential further advance for technological assistance within cricket and could boost the appeal of Test cricket to today’s youngsters.<br />
Swann, on his latest update, said “Looking at bowling through Twitter. Leave me more time to make fun of Broady! LOL”.<br />
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An ICC spokesperson was quoted as saying that “we are interested in looking at this further. Obviously we have no idea what this ‘Twitter’ thing is, but if there is the opportunity for us to make money off it then we will consider it”.<br />
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Former players, such as Geoffrey Boycott, have come out in opposition to this plan however. “It’s ludicrous” fumed Boycott, “how the lad Swann plans to describe his deliveries in just 140 characters beggars belief. He’ll not be able to describe any appreciable turn or bounce and even my grandmother would be able to read him”.<br />
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Other current players are more enthusiastic about taking up the option for themselves. New Zealand opener Jesse Ryder is openly a big fan saying “my favourite pub has internet access so this is like a dream come true for me”. However, there will be some issues to iron out – after Ryder had an internet practice session, ICC officials and umpires were unable to agree on an interpretation of Ryder’s last update of “you’re my besht friend you are”.</div>Man_in_Beigehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09261862108444079448noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5279694790373398611.post-30188747470304353402011-03-29T22:06:00.002+13:002011-04-09T20:12:46.575+12:00The Beige Archives: Vettori invades Poland<div class="content"><em>This article first appeared on cricket-match-special.com on the 1st of November 2009.</em><br />
</div><div class="content"></div><div class="content">New Zealand cricket captain, coach and star player Daniel Vettori sent shockwaves throughout the world today when he orchestrated his team’s sudden and comprehensive invasion of Poland. This signals that his lust for power has not been sated by his elevation to every major position in New Zealand cricket.<br />
<br />
The invasion was one-sided with the Poles unable to cope with Vettori’s guile and variations in flight. No other member of the New Zealand attack made any significant contribution however.<br />
<br />
The invasion comes as a massive public relations disaster for the ICC, who, following last week’s crisis talks with Vettori, had confidently spoken of “peace for our time”. ICC chairman David Morgan was extremely disappointed with the developments saying that it makes the ICC look "weak and foolish", but most commentators agree that they fail to see any difference.<br />
<br />
Vettori, or Supreme Generalissimo Vettori as he is now known, has issued a statement saying his one goal is to create a “master-race” of left arm spinners who will take over the world of international cricket. England spinner Monty Panesar is excited by the prospect saying "maybe in a team full of left-arm spinners I've got a chance of getting a game".<br />
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Many international leaders have condemned the actions of Supreme Generalissimo Vettori, with North Korean leader Kim Jong-Il saying that “no one man should have that much power – it isn’t right”. <br />
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In other news, French president Nicolas Sarkozy denies that France has already surrendered.</div>Man_in_Beigehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09261862108444079448noreply@blogger.com0